Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Doin' the Woo Hoo and Twistin' and Bowlin' with King Uszniewicz and his Usniewicztones

Have you ever seen a band, or better yet, been in a band where no one could really play their instruments? Or maybe you all liked to drink too much? Or both? Was the love of music, and having a damn good time doing it, far more important than musical prowess? The audience just never understood, did they?
If you can answer yes to any of these questions then you are in for one hell of a treat.
Regular "oldies rock" performers at the Orbit Room (the bar in a bowling alley) throughout the 1970's in Brentwood, Michigan, King U. & his U-Tones must have put on some pretty interesting, criminally under-attended shows...probably more like spectacles. One of my favorite stories is that when the King fired the lead guitarist for bringing a wah-wah pedal to the gig. Having seen the pin spotter at the bowling alley messing with the equipment before the show, they asked him to join the band, even though he only knew how to kind of play an E chord. Nevertheless, Logjam Lurch Patterson spent the next 6 years as a U-Tone.
Basically they just butchered the hell out of oldies, but thought they were great. If you can look past the fact that they can't play on rhythm, sing on key, play well (check out the saxophone...yeesh), and inability to remember lyrics you will hear the true spirit of rock n' roll AKA the sound of a group of friends having a great time together playing the music they love with all they've got. No matter how little they've actually got.
Personally, I cannot get tired of these records. Unlike comedy albums, these never lose their humor (to me). It's very difficult to put the greatness of the King's delivery into words, you just need to hear it.
I'm too sober to keep going on here, but if you like drinking, laughing, rock n' roll and you aren't one of those fucking assholes who take everything too seriously, today is your lucky day. And there's one more record too.
Ladies and gentlemen: the real king of rock n' roll!

Woo Hoo

Twistin' and Bowlin'


  1. Just in case you feel you're howling into a vacuum in this particular Usniewiczian instance (though it's pretty clear you didn't get into this blog racket for the approbation) I just wanted to say thanks so much for posting this stuff.

    My ears are singing, my ribcage hurts and my day is brighter thanks to Michigan's finest.

    I'd hope the rest of my life will be that iota brighter for their input too, but let's not get too far ahead of ourselves right now. Thanks for pitching this stuff up, though, really, it's much appreciated.

    Best, A.

  2. I love hearing someone other than me singing the praise of the U-Tones, and I'm more than happy to share this with the tens of people searching for it.

  3. King U Rocks! So bad, it's good. They are the real animal house guys.

  4. 8 more King U. tracks recently found and available from Norton Records. Mine's due any day now, can't wait.

  5. "Surfin' School" is the first song I ever converted from vinyl to digital. This was pre-USB turntables and I had to copy to a DAT deck, a laborious process. I have all 3 King U records but never converted the other two. Thanks for the upload. I now have all of them on the iPod.

  6. Could you please reup all 3 king u lps?